For the Love of Home

Caring for Others:

Recently I had a conversation with someone and the topic turned to work. I explained that I worked in our business until recently when I stepped out of the workforce altogether. The next (and obvious) question posed was, “What do you do now?” My immediate answer was that “I’m writing…” And while that is true, I am writing – I write this blog, I’m currently in conversations with a publisher about a book I’ve written. But the real, true, answer is…. I am a homemaker. And I do it all for the love of home.

01. What is home?

I recently received an email from a magazine; the subject line was “Creating an Ideal Home.” That made me stop and question, “What is an ideal home?” In fact, what is home altogether anyway?

Home is more than the dwelling in which we reside. It is more than the furnishings, more than the decor, more than the artwork and nick-knacks. I believe home is a feeling. Home is the feeling of being loved and of belonging. It is wherever we find our safe space.

02. What makes an ideal home?

If home is the feeling of being loved and of belonging, then how do we create the ideal home? That is where our love for our families…for ourselves…comes into focus. If home is simply a decorated space with perfect color palettes and beautiful furnishings, then home is just…well, a house.

There was a parade of homes in the city where we lived and each year we would tour ten to twelve newly built and designed houses. Don’t misunderstand me. They were beautiful. But there was this feeling that they were simply there for show. There were no personal touches, no reminders of vacations, no signs of actual life. I never left feeling like I’d spend time with a trusted friend.

If we seek to create an ideal home, we must first understand that home isn’t the house. Home is the feeling it gives. It’s literally the defining of the love of home, of knowing what home means to us and how we can share that love with others.

03. What makes us feel at home?

Have you ever been to someone’s house and immediately felt at home? Well, that is the outcome of the love of home. It’s how we share our spaces with grace and with love to others. Maybe it’s our family and friends, maybe we host an occasional book club or Bible study, maybe we invite in new neighbors to make them feel welcome in the community. Whatever the reason – the love of home is reflected in how we care for the people who enter our spaces.

So that poses the question: “What makes you feel at home?” Is it the freedom to put your feet up? Or maybe it’s the comfort in knowing you can rest your head back and take a cat nap. Maybe it’s knowing you’re welcome to get yourself a drink, or help yourself to a snack. Having that knowledge is what helps you recreate that feeling in your own home, with your own guests.

04. Making others feel at home

When we think of making others feel at home in our spaces, we can first share that sentiment with them verbally. “Come in! Please make yourself at home.” That is always such a welcoming statement. It means that our guests don’t have to worry about being an inconvenience, tracking in a little dirt, or dirtying a dish. In fact, it means they can come in and simply be themselves without fear of rejection or judgment.

Offering a beverage is always a welcome gesture as well. Whatever the weather dictates, a warm beverage on a cold day or a cool beverage on a warm day, offering our guests something to drink helps them feel comfortable in our homes. There have been scientific studies regarding the effects of holding a warm beverage. Holding a warm beverage can cause feelings of trust, of relaxation, and a sense of belonging. Holding a hot beverage can actually stimulate pleasant emotional memories. So whether you want to remind someone of happy times, or you want to be the memory of happy times, offering a beverage is always a great idea.

These are only two suggestions, but there are so many ways to make others feel at home in our spaces. I’ve found an amazing article that goes into more detail. If you’re interested, you can access it here.

05. Home isn’t about the space

The final thing I want to leave you with is this: Home isn’t about the space. It isn’t about your square footage, your furnishings, or your style. It’s about creating space for others to feel like they are important, seen, loved, and welcome. It’s about sharing your particular love of home with those inside its four walls.

• Are you a baker? Share the love of home with others through your culinary skills.
• Are you a designer? Share the love of home by creating a warm and welcoming space.
• Are you a listener? Share the love of home by opening the doors of your heart to others.
• Are you a homemaker? Share the love of home by inspiring or motivation others who share your space.

Knowing your guests, or your family’s personalities, helps you to make sure they are loved in the way that best suits their needs. Share your love of home, and the people who enter it will feel loved as well. There is an old saying: “Pride walks in and says, ‘Here I am.’ Humility walks in and says, ‘There you are!!!’ Above all things, make certain others feel like they are the most important thing you are engaged with at the time.

xo, Billie

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