It’s been said that overnight house guests come with one golden rule: be a courteous visitor; not a burden. There are a couple of aspects to this behavior: Respect your host’s routine, be clear regarding any dietary needs, and always leave your designated area tidy before leaving. But the curious thing to me is how we so willingly do these things for hosts and hostesses, but skimp on the same behavior in our own homes.
Respect routines…
Flexibility is a virtue in my book. I say that because once I’m into a project, a task, or a chore, it is very difficult for me to be interrupted. Why? Because I’m the type of person who can walk into the other room to find my glasses, and forget my purpose by the time I arrive at said destination. Flexible people can start a task, go start another task, and even begin a third task. And that’s when the magic really happens! They actually can go back to the first task and complete it! Not me!
Having house guests is a joy for me; I love the preparation and the visit. But when truthful, I’m always happy to return to my routine. I like knowing what’s upcoming, what I’ve still left to do, and when it’s time to begin winding down for the evening.
Routines are very important to me. Daily routines include morning tea, a walk, a workout, a coffee, and then I begin my day of work, chores or errands. Respecting routines is one of the golden rule behaviors of guests, but do I treat myself with that same courtesy?
Dietary needs…
When hosting guests, overnight or otherwise, it’s always a good idea to ask about special dietary needs. In our little family we have a milk allergy and a fruit allergy. I have a dear friend with Celiac’s disease. We always communicate food allergies when making dinner plans, or hosting or attending a dinner. It’s a courtesy to those who are hosting, and it’s a benefit to those who are attending.
When preparing for house guests, I try to incorporate their favorite dishes, provide a few local treats or snacks, and always keep in mind any dietary needs they may have communicated.
Good food has become an object of interest as of late. We have so much fresh produce available to us where we live; farm shops, orchards, roadside stands, and farmers’ markets are overflowing with goodness. It is such an adventure to seek out these shops, bring home baskets and totes full of fresh produce, and then mix it into salads or toss it into delicious recipes. The summer is literally abundant with harvest. Being clear about dietary choices is also one of the golden rule behaviors. Do I give myself that same loving care?
Tidy up after yourself…
We tried to teach our children that it was respectful to a host family, and plain-old-good manners to clean up after themselves when attending someone else’s home. There were simple rules to this advice: put away your dirty dishes, pick up your clothes, keep the bathroom tidy after use. Simple enough, right?
One evening after a long soak in a hot tub, (and an equally as long day), I emerged from the steaming bubbles exhausted and ready for a good sleep. It was very tempting to leave the droplets of water on the floor, to toss my towel over the tub deck, and leave the shampoo, conditioner, and body wash in the shower basin.
But, being a good house guest taught me to pick up after myself when finished. So with a sigh and a yawn, I hung the towel on the towel bar, placed the products back on the closet shelf, and wiped up the water droplets from the floor. I closed the shower curtain and looked around the room with a sense of appreciation. My future self was already appreciative.
Do unto others…
The golden rule tells us to ‘Do unto others as we would have them do unto us.’ It’s simply. Treat others the way you would want them to treat you. But so often, I find myself not doing unto myself the way I would do unto others, or would certainly expect them to do unto me if they were a guest in my home. In fact, let me go one step further. There are moments when, if I were a guest in my own home, I wouldn’t invite myself back again!
routines:
One of the things I’m focusing on for the latter part of this year is sticking to the routines I’ve worked so diligently to build. I have a little post it on my refrigerator door that says, “Walk. Workout. Water. Repeat.” It’s a simply reminder to me every day that I need to take a walk, I need to do some kind of strength workout, I need to drink the right amount of water, and I need to do these things on repeat! Respecting my established routines is one of the things my future self will thank me for.
Diets:
Choosing to eat the best ingredients I can find, preparing them myself, and focusing on good dietary choices is one of the greatest joys I have during the summer months. Don’t misunderstand; during the winter I’m all about roasts with gravy over mashed potatoes, creamy, cheesy casseroles, and all sorts of savory goodness. But with fresh produce so readily available, being diligent with dietary choices is one of the things my future self will thank me for.
Tidy Up:
Sometimes I wake up to last night’s tea cup sitting on side table, I leave a towel on the tub deck instead of on the towel bar, or I left my shoes beside the door instead of placing them in the closet. There is something to be said about being at home in our own homes. It’s a place of comfort; it’s where we’re supposed to find solace and rest. So why do I place extra work on myself? Why do I make the workload harder than it has to be? Tidying up after myself, as if I were my own houseguest, is one of the things my future self will thank me for.
Your future self will love you for it…
I wonder how our lives would change for the better, if we simply began to treat ourselves the way we want to be treated… if we applied the golden rule of house guests to ourselves. What would transpire in our homes if we simply treated our future selves the way we would expect our guests to treat us? I’m not suggesting that we can keep our homes immaculate all of the time; that’s impossible. But what if we chose to be intentional about our behaviors? What if we did the extra step like putting the coffee mug in the sink, or placing the towel on the towel bar? How much change would we see? Would our homes feel less chaotic, less cluttered, less messy?
I think a little experiment is in order. What if we behaved like good house guests in our own homes, and treated our future selves the way we would want to be treated?
