discover home:
I’ve been thinking a lot about the idea of home lately. If you’re new here, John and I sold our family home in April of last year. We had lived there for eighteen years and raised our children there. But we have had multiple homes; our first newlywed apartment in a not-so-great end of town, our first house – a three bedroom brick ranch on a wooded acre of land, a two story new build that ended up being too small from the start, a four bedroom two story walk-out with a wooded back lot with a pond, and now, a two bedroom, two bath apartment in a dream location. Each one has held its own memories and each one we have called home. There is a beautiful symphony to discovering home. Here is what I’ve learned in the process.
home is where the heart is…
We’ve heard that before, haven’t we? Home is where the heart is. That is the first thing I have found to be absolutely true. The challenge becomes discovering home when your heart isn’t quite in it. Whether it’s a move we didn’t want, a location we didn’t love, or the way we grow bored with what used to be enough, sometimes our heart isn’t in it. In those times, home is hard to find. But there are a few way I have learned we can discover home no matter where we are.
Here are five things you can rely on as you seek to discover home…
Rely on comforts…
Last Christmas was the first Christmas we had spent not in our family home. It was our first Christmas entirely in our apartment, and to be honest, I wondered how I would feel without the familiar surrounding of home. But slowly, as I pulled beloved ornaments and nostalgic pieces from storage, our little apartment began to feel like home. The nativity set, the ornaments, the scented candles, the placemats…they all were integral pieces of Christmases past. And what I learned was that discovering home relied on the comforts I needed during a time of transition.
Rely on staples…
There are a few things that are staples in my life: my candles, my favorite fragrances, my favorite coffee mugs, my creature comforts of a silly little thing like the feel of a cotton dish towel, and the feeling of home a simple table setting can bring.
During the summer I burn Vanilla Sandalwood candles. It smells like home to me – in fact, last summer something felt off… I couldn’t define it. As soon as I lit my candle, the apartment smelled like home and everything felt right again.
I have a few coffee mugs that have quickly become my favorites; they are Morris and Co and have the beloved patterns of English designer William Morris on them. I love them, and although they are relatively new, they feel like home to me. My cotton dish towels are the same way; they are soft and well-worn and they are reminiscent of a time when clothes were dried on an outdoor line… I love them.
Rely on routine…
I have also learned that discovering home comes when we rely on our routines and our habits. When I pick up a knitting piece, lace up my walking shoes, or unfold my yoga mat, these routines bring familiarity to my days – even when things around me are not familiar.
If you’re a walker, find a path or a park and begin to discover home through the new routine. Discover home by picking up familiar hobbies or seeking out familiar community groups. Getting into routine will have you discovering home when things around you feel distant and disconnected.
Rely of the familiar…
Comfort foods are one of the best and easiest ways to discover home. When we move, I always plan a couple of familiar recipes the first week in our new location. Sometimes it’s a simple spaghetti and garlic bread, sometimes it’s chicken and dumplings, sometimes it’s a family recipe that will leave us feeling connected, even when everything around us is new.
We also have a few favorite playlists. When I’m cleaning the kitchen or watering my balcony garden, I listen to Ophilia Wilde. It’s familiar and always feels like home. Sometimes I light a couple candles and put on my Nora Jones vinyl. It also feels like home….
Maybe it’s unboxing your favorite books; waking up to a cup of tea or coffee and leafing through the familiar pages will go a long way in discovering home. It will also provide you inspiration to get you through long hours of unpacking.
Rely on love…
Finally, the simplest way to discovering home is to rely on the familiarity of love. Home is where the heart is, and it is best when we share it with those we love. It doesn’t matter if it’s a second-floor apartment, a rental house, a newly purchased family home, or a temporary space in a new, temporary place.
And when we play all the pieces and parts together as a whole, relying on familiarity, comfort, staples, routine, and love, it becomes a beautiful symphony of discovering home.
xo, Billie
resources:
- Home is Where the Heart Is: https://forwardourmail.com/home-is-where-the-heart-is/
- Ophelia Wilde: http://www.youtube.com/@Ophelia-Wilde
- For the Love of Home: https://forwardourmail.com/for-the-love-of-home/
