Peanut Butter Fudge and Valuable Life Lessons

Caring for…

I contemplated in which category to place this post. Would it be Caring for Home, Caring for Others, or Caring for Yourself? The truth is, this is a valuable life lesson I learned while making a simple batch of Peanut Butter Fudge – and I am very thoughtful in saying that I believe it falls equally under each category. Because it applies to every area of life. If you’re here looking for a peanut butter fudge recipe, please be patient. It will come at the end of the post. But rest assured, you will leave with more than a sugary batch of yummy goodness. My hope is, you will leave with a valuable life lesson that will carry you through the remainder of days. Let’s go…

Lessons learned…

Peanut butter fudge is a Christmas tradition at our house. I’m one of those weird folks who truly dislikes chocolate fudge. Peanut butter fudge, however…well, that’s another story altogether.

But peanut butter fudge is a tricky business. You must consider so many factors; what is the weather like? Is there too much, or not enough moisture in the air? How is the consistency of the peanut butter? What is the peanut to oil ratio? What milk are you using? Whole milk has more fat content and will lend a creamier texture, while a 2% or fat free milk contain more water and will change the cooking time of the fudge.

These are all ‘life lessons’ I’ve learned over the coarse of many years. I have thrown away many failed batches of peanut butter fudge. Some were too dry and crumbly. Others we had to eat with a spoon because they didn’t set.

A watched pot never boils…

One thing I’ve learned in my fudge making endeavors is that a watched pot never boils. This is not only true when cooking up a batch of peanut butter fudge, but it’s true for many aspects of life.

This year as I stood at my stovetop watching for the sugar, butter, and milk to come to a boil, I waited. And waited, and waited, and waited. It was then that it occurred to me how I’m often in a rush. I’m in a rush for tasks to be completed, for a vacation to arrive, for Christmas to come.

But I’m also in a rush for miracles to occur, for fences to be mended, and for time to heal all wounds. I’m afraid I want what I want, when I want it. And most of the time, I want it right now!.

But some things take time – and in most instances, time is a good thing. And so whether making peanut butter fudge, or waiting for a good thing to occur, the old adage is true: “A watched pot never boils.” It’s better to let time be time and be as patient as possible in the meantime.

A watched pot never boils. Until it does…

While waiting not-so-patiently for my peanut butter fudge to come to a boil, I decided I would take the opportunity to set my pantry back into some order. Thanksgiving had wreaked havoc on my nicely organized baskets and bins, and since I was just standing there, I thought it was a great opportunity to set things right.

I promise I only looked away for a minute! Okay, maybe it was more like 5 minutes. I might have lost track of time..but it wasn’t long before I heard a strange sound from behind me. When I turned to look at what it was, I saw all of that sticky, sugary, buttery concoction bubbling away – and nearly bubbling over.

Let me tell you, I was mere seconds from having a disaster on my hands. That’s when I learned that a watched pot never boils…until it does.

As I gently stirred the bubbly mixture, it came back down to a slow simmer. The mess and disaster had been avoided simply by paying a little attention. I had grown impatient in my watching and gotten distracted by something else, when all chaos nearly broke loose.

Life is funny like that…

Life is also funny like that. We wait and wait for something to happen, and in our impatience we grow distracted by something else. Maybe that something, like my pantry, truly does need our attention. Maybe we just grow impatient and need a distraction. Either way, life has a way of going from something we are excited for to something that is putting us into a near panic.

Sometimes the solution is simply…

As I stood there caught between a watched pot that never boiled and one that nearly boiled over, and a chaotic mess I’d made by trying to re-organize my pantry, I learned a couple of very valuable lessons. This applies to every aspect of life whether we are caring for our homes, caring for others, or caring for ourselves.

It’s okay to focus on one thing at a time. We don’t have to do it all at once. It isn’t a requirement that we excel at multi-tasking. Doing one thing at a time is most often enough. It allows us to really focus on the task, and it allows us to intentionally slow down and enjoy the thing we are doing. In this way, it is an aspect of caring for ourselves. It removes the pressure to be everything to everyone, and simply focus and enjoy the moment we are in.
Life will always be right on the verge of chaos. I remember reading David Allen’s book, “Getting Things Done.” In it, he remarks that you can make the best laid plans, but rarely, when you look at your life six months down the road, does it actually look like what you had envisioned. Life has a way of throwing us curve balls. And much like the pot of peanut butter fudge, it can go from nothing happening to a full rolling boil in a split second. We must practice and hone our skill at managing the chaos, and also practice and hone the skill of being flexible when life gets messy. In this way, it is an aspect of caring for home. When we manage the little things with consistency and attention, it can ward off the bigger messes that threaten our peace of mind.
One simple change can change everything. As I stood there in the midst of a balancing act between a boil over and a bare simmer, it occurred to me that I could tweak the temperature. Please hear this carefully: I turned down the heat on my stovetop by one single notch. One! One. Single. Notch. That one change was exactly what was needed to bring my peanut butter fudge to the simmering gentle boil – what my recipe calls for in order to reach perfection. When I turned down the heat by one tiny increment, all the chaos came back into order. I could then watch more carefully and prevent the risk of a boil. In this way, it is an aspect of caring for others. Sometimes relationships are tricky. Remember that having the last word doesn’t make you right – it only makes you last. Turning down the temperature in tense situations can be exactly the right method to employ to keep a situation from getting sticky.

When life gets messy…

Sometimes, when life gets messy, instead of standing there fighting a boil over and chaos, all we really need to do is turn down the heat one single notch.

The thing about peanut butter fudge is that everyone’s stovetop is different. Making fudge on an apartment-grade electric stove was much different than the gas stove top we had in our house. The gas stove top had cast iron grates that were heat conductive and had been carefully leveled. The apartment stove top is electric and takes time to react to temperature changes, also the burners here are not quite level. So many factors play a role in how your fudge will turn out. And that’s true in life, as well.

Some people can stand a little more heat before their lives verge on disaster. Others need order; they don’t deal well with sudden temperature changes. For them, temperature changes can bring on a sticky mess that will send them into a state of panic.

My advice to you, while making peanut butter fudge and managing life, is to know your own temperature. Know what sends you into a frenzy, and when to turn down the temperature a notch.

So the next time a watched pot goes from never boiling to nearly boiling over, try turning down the heat. Try practicing the self care that is most beneficial to you. Talk with someone you trust:https://www.betterhelp.com Go for a walk. Let go of unnecessarily high expectations. Whatever you have to do to turn down the heat by even one notch will bring you much benefit, and may prevent a boil over.

I wish you a very happy and healthy Christmas with lots and lots of peanut butter fudge!

xo, Billie